While divorce is not typically an enjoyable stage in one’s life, there is no reason that going through a divorce needs to be an exceptionally negative experience. Many divorces proceed in a fairly efficient businesslike fashion toward an amicable resolution. Admittedly, the intense emotions that often accompany the divorce process can present a barrier to effective communication, but our Santa Fe, NM Divorce Lawyers help our clients make a difficult situation less stressful by developing creative solutions that minimize unnecessary animosity.
Because we have represented hundreds upon hundreds of clients in divorces, we have unique insight into the types of conduct that can torpedo a mutually amicable divorce process and turn it into a bitterly contested litigated divorce. While sometimes litigation is necessary, parties that are unable to negotiate a settlement in the dispassionate manner that one might negotiate a business buyout agreement typically experience more stress and expense. We have provided two examples of types of conduct that we have seen escalate the cost and conflict in a divorce.
Taking Positions Not Supported by the Law or Facts
One of the easiest ways to undermine settlement negotiations in a divorce is by adopting a position that is essentially indefensible in the courtroom. An example might be a request by a truck driver who is on the road three weeks out of the month for primary physical custody with the intention of having his mom watch the kids while he is on the road. If we add to this scenario that his spouse was a stay at home mom throughout the marriage, the request borders on ludicrous unless mom has some serious “parental fitness” issue like a substance abuse problem. While this may seem obvious, we hear from many fathers with comparable requests because they are concerned about child support.
By the same token, a mom who insists on sole custody of the children with supervised visitation to the father because he committed adultery and “betrayed the family” takes an equally indefensible position without evidence of a lack of parental fitness. The problem with taking these positions is that they interfere with a genuine resolution of the issues in the case because no judge would honor such a request under the indicated facts. The more reasonable the positions taken during settlement negotiations the easier it is to arrive at terms to be included in a marital settlement agreement (MSA). This means that the positions that the parties adopt in negotiations need to be within the realm of possible outcomes if the case is litigated in front of a family law judge.
Settling Financial Issues for Less than Needed or More than Is Affordable
While global settlements are usually a positive outcome for both parties in a divorce, there is a risk that a party who is unrepresented may feel pressured to accept terms that are financially unacceptable simply to “make peace” and obtain closure. This type of strategy typically fails because a party who agrees to pay more than he or she can pay in alimony, for example, may fall behind and face contempt proceedings or need future litigation to modify the order. Similarly, a wife that agrees to a fixed termination date of spousal support that does not allow enough time for economic rehabilitation or agrees to an amount that is insufficient for his/her realistic needs might also face severe financial hardships and future litigation. When our Santa Fe Divorce Lawyers represent clients in settlement negotiations, the goal is to obtain a resolution that meets our clients’ needs to minimize future financial challenges and achieve finality in the judgment.
The above information is designed solely to illustrate general principles of law, and does not constitute a specific legal opinion on individual cases. We suggest that you contact experienced legal counsel for a specific opinion tailored to your individual circumstances.
While not every divorce can be resolved through a negotiated settlement agreement, we handle many divorces where the parties are able to walk away reasonably satisfied and to cooperate on parenting issues in the future. If you have specific concerns about your situation, we invite you to talk to our Santa Fe divorce attorneys. Jay Goodman & Associates offers a free consultation in our centrally located offices in Santa Fe and Albuquerque so that we can discuss your situation and answer your questions. Call us today to schedule your free consultation at (505) 989-8117 to learn about your rights and options.
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